Day 6

I very clearly won’t be updating daily, its much too boring. It’d only be a few lines. Oh, I did well today. Moving on.

I did in fact do well this weekend. Still haven’t had any Diet Pepsi, and I’ve mostly strayed from any soda at all. I’ll be having Dr. Pepper whenever boo gets some, stealing sips is something I may never get over. But, I still get thirsty and some days, we don’t have clean water for me to drink, and I’m not THAT crazy about milk. I’ve got to get something I can keep up on. I should just bring my water purifier over. I’ll keep it filled and cold in the fridge. I’ve got that housewife habit, I’ll be able to keep it up. I’ve been keeping up on the ice for the bong since I brought my new bong home. 🙂 I can do it.

I’ve come to notice how very clumsy I am. I was clumsy before, but it seems I’ve gotten even more so. I may have made new habits to clean more, and I most desperately want to move EVERYTHING so I can sweep, mop, dust, scrub some, I want to clean the place, I want to help as much as I can. But I want to start fresh, with a clean home. And simply keep it up.

I wish I knew why I craved cleaning SO desperately. I mean, I didn’t at my own little place, and it was smaller, much smaller. Do I need a bigger project? I know I like to have projects, but maybe my place was too small, and not worth the time since I knew I didnt want to live there forever. Just maybe a year. It’ll be much less.

Ashley cleaned up our little apartment, moved my stuff…. anywhere else. Its organized. I just didn’t expect it. I mean, it was bound to happen. Its mostly her place, and my stuff is held there as storage, it still kind of annoyed me to come home to find. But, its not really my place anymore. Not really my place anymore. Maybe I should’ve asked her to cover more of the rent. I wasn’t aware I wouldn’t really be there at all, like even less than I was before. I’ve got my cute key, but no reason to go there besides to see Chase. I don’t have clothes there. Or my Xbox. I do still have all my movies and shows. Which I’m starting to miss. I really wish I could have Chase. I REALLLLLLLY wish I could have Chase. I’m not even sure she knows who I am anymore. Maybe hates me since I’m no longer their as her mommy. And that face she gives as I lock up and close the door. I just miss her. I almost cry when I go through my photos, see her as well as Boo, and Ferris. The cutie pies, gone forever.

Anyways. Day 6. Going well. I most definitely love not having a lot of Soda products in my life. And LOTS more water. 🙂 This weekend I’m going in to get my nails redone. So, I hope to keep them up as well til I no longer attempt to bite my nails. Ever again.


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